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The Definition of LOVER?
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Post The Definition of LOVER? 
This happened a couple of years ago when I was dating this friend. She always thought I was her lover. I knew she wasn't seeing anyone else, neither was I. But I was very confused as to what she meant by lover.

Anyway, the romantic relationship didn't last long. Later she told me she wasn't ready for relationship, but still I don't have a grip of this lover concept.

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Hmmm...in my limited experience, I would only call someone my "lover" if we were in a fairly committed relationship that also included sex. It would have to be that odd middle ground between "boyfriend" (which sounds terribly silly coming from a 42 yr old woman) and "husband".

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I generally agree with LadyM on this.

I think the yippie-hippie definition of "lover" these days is "friends with benefits."

But yeah, it generally just means someone you're sleeping with but not engaged, married or otherwise committed to.

In yet another parlance... you were her booty call!

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You can have more than one lover, but you can only have one girlfriend or one wife.

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Are you SURE about that, Terry? While I agree... one wife is plenty to handle... I'll bet there are some on this community that don't... Wink

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These things are always so tough. Labels for relationships. Trying to fit something unique and organic into a category with clear boudaries and definitions. My boyfriend and I waited a LONG time before we decided that calling each other "girlfriend" and "boyfriend" was appropriate for our relationship.

Other alternatives I like:

Lover
Significant Other (S.O. for short)
Partner

I agree with LadyM that the older you get, the sillier you feel using the term "boyfriend", which conjures up images of making out in the cafeteria during lunch period. It also does imply a level of commitment and seriousness, which we personally weren't sure we wanted to embrace for a while. Eventually we did, and now it's been almost a year since we went on our first date. And the label isn't an issue anymore.

Don't know if that helped. Laughing

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I'm not a big fan of "significant other" or "partner."

Too generic, too PC.

Just my POV

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