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Funny Bumper Stickers
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Don't Be Sexist - Bitches Hate That.

Constipated People Don't Give A Shit.

Practice Safe Sex, Go Screw Yourself.

If You Drink Don't Park, Accidents Cause People.

If You Don't Believe In Oral Sex, Keep Your Mouth Shut.

Please Tell Your Pants It's Not Polite To Point.

If That Phone Was Up Your Butt, Maybe You Could Drive A Little Better.

My Kid Got Your Honor Roll Student Pregnant.

To All You Virgins: Thanks For Nothing.

Impotence: Nature's Way Of Saying "No Hard Feelings".

If You Can Read This, I've Lost My Trailer.

Horn Broken... Watch For Finger.

It's Not How You Pick Your Nose, But Where You Put The Booger.

If You're Not A Hemorrhoid, Get Off My Ass.

You're Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To Me.

The Earth Is Full - Go Home.

So Many Pedestrians - So Little Time.

Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult.

If We Quit Voting Will They All Go Away?

The Face Is Familiar, But I Can't Quite Remember My Name.

Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway.

Iliterate? Write For Help.

Honk If Anything Falls Off.

Cover Me, I'm Changing Lanes.

He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost But Miles From The Next Exit .

I Refuse To Have A Battle Of Wits With An Unarmed Person.

You! Out Of The Gene Pool!

I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To.

Where Are We Going And Why Am I In This Handbasket?

If Sex Is A Pain In The Ass, Then You're Doing It Wrong...

Fight Crime: Shoot Back!

If You Can Read This, Please Flip Me Back Over... (Seen Upside Down On A Jeep)

Remember Folks: Stop Lights Timed For 35mph Are Also Timed For 70mph.

Guys: No Shirt, No Service.
Gals: No Shirt, No Charge

If Walking Is So Good For You, then Why Does My Mailman Look Like Jabba the Hut?

Ax Me About Ebonics.

Body By Nautilus; Brain By Mattel.

Boldly Going Nowhere.

Caution - Driver Legally Blonde.

Heart Attacks ... God's Revenge For Eating His Animal Friends.

Honk If You've Never Seen An Uzi Fired From A Car Window.

How Many Roads Must A Man Travel Down Before He Admits He is lost?

If You Can't Dazzle Them With Brilliance, Riddle Them With Bullets.

Money Isn't Everything, But It Sure Keeps The Kids In Touch.

Saw It... Wanted It... Had A Fit... Got It!

My Hockey Mom Can Beat Up Your Soccer Mom.


All Men Are Animals, Some Just Make Better Pets.

Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.

I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.

BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore.

So you're a feminist...Isn't that precious.

I need someone really bad...Are you really bad?

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

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Friends Don't Let Friends Vote DFL

One More Time: Dukakis Lost... Get Over It and Buy A New Bumper!

Actually, The Rapture WAS in 1988... Welcome To Hell!

God Came, You're Still Here... Kiss My Left Behind!

Visualize THIS, Hippie! (drawing of a hand flipping the bird)

Paul's Dead. (Written on a drawing of a green bus)

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Visualize Whirled Peas
Somewhere in Texas a Village is Missing It's Idiot
Keep Honking! I'm Reloading
Hello Ossifer, It's Me Again
My Keys are on the Front Seat, Next to My Norwegian Elkhound
Jesus is Coming, Look Busy!

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I found Jesus. He was behind the couch the whole time.

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Got 'Er Did

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Frodo failed. Bush has the ring.

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I'd rather be casting out demons. (and the old lady driving the car, I'm pretty sure, would.)
I love my country. But I'm beginning to think we should see other people.

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